Some years ago, I read this thing writer-director Kevin Smith said:

Yes, I believe in God. Why? Because I have a career. There can be no better explanation or proof of the existence of God than the fact that I have a film career!

At the time, I found this notion theologically offensive and morally repugnant. If that's the case, and God is to thank for Kevin Smith's successful film career (aside from all other factors such as luck and talent), then that's one big honking middle finger from God to most of the rest of us, His creation--explicitly those who are struggling to carve out a place for themselves in the film industry and also, implicitly, everyone on Earth (all ~6.999 billion of them) who would be considered less fortunate.

As I was driving home from school today, this crossed my mind again and I had a disturbing thought: what if instead of being theologically offensive, this is the most theologically sound thing that's ever been said? What if God really has favored Kevin Smith, simply because Kevin Smith is to be favored? Maybe questions of piety and religion and faith don't matter in the slightest, and any and all success comes simply because you're one of God's select favorites. Maybe God favors those with souls and maybe the rest of us are without souls. Talent, business savvy, the goodness of our fellow man--these things ultimately don't matter when God overrides it all with His spoils for His people.

But then I had a thought that's maybe even more disturbing: What if God has blessed Kevin Smith with his film career simply because God wants Kevin Smith movies?

What if you get up to the afterlife and God is just constantly hosting a never-ending View Askew-niverse marathon. How many times can we make it through Mallrats before we inquire about throwing in with Satan?

Labels: God, Kevin Smith, religion

Find yourself spirited away to the Field of Puppies.

Before you lies a vast, green expanse. The ceiling is a deep blue sky, lightly populated with fluffy white clouds that will give way to a dark, sacred night full of stars. The ground is covered with beautiful green grass, healthy and trim. And atop that grass, as far as the eye can see, are innumerable puppies frolicking in the field. All around you are wet noses, soft paws, and tiny, wagging tails.

In the Field of Puppies, the puppies are playful and frisky, but attuned to your wants and needs. Their adorable, soft barks will quiet if you quiet is what you desire. If you wish to play with them, they will be only too happy to comply. These puppies do not make messes; they smell like dreams and roses.

In the Field of Puppies, there are puppies of every breed and color. Should you wish to spend your time among Rottweiler puppies, they will be easy to find. Should you wish to play with Spaniels, seek them out. And if you wish to take a nap among a mixed group of breeds--the cutest, most adorable puppies of every shape and temperament there are--simply lie down in the cool grass. Puppies will flock to you and fall asleep on your resting body, creating a most incredibly comfortable blanket of puppies.

Return again and again to the Field of Puppies, a land of peace, warmth, and impossible cuteness.

Labels: Field of Puppies, puppies

If you've followed this blog at all in the last few months, you may have noticed that I abruptly stopped updating nearly a month ago, after so very nearly a year of daily or five-times-weekly updates. Indeed, I was nearing the anniversary of starting my daily content project. I was actually preparing to announce a great slowing down of my post production around September 16, when I last published this blog. As the weeks went on, I found myself sitting down to write or draw my posts after work, trying to produce something, anything before midnight. I felt like I do on those nights that my mind is racing and I keep telling myself "I have to sleep tonight. I have to!" Almost without fail, I'll eventually sleep, but it's rarely satisfying.

But then my personal life took a happy and rather distracting turn and I pretty much forgot all about Whatnot Studios. Creatively, I'd also like to focus on longer, more involved projects than nightly work on a blog can really allow. This experiment has been richly rewarding, though, and I hope that I will be able to keep up some of this momentum and continue producing work in some of my favorite demonstrated directions.

Keep an eye out here. Posts will become more frequent again. Thanks for reading!

Labels: whatnot

Without a sound, Wednesday crept up on Tuesday, and engulfed it in its embrace. When the warm waves of Wednesday quieted, Tuesday had vanished. And thus Wednesday reigned. But when Thursday arrived, Wednesday receded with characteristic silence and grace, acquiescing to the new day.

Labels: Wednesday

Today has been a good, mostly lazy day to do laundry, read books, talk to people, and think. Among the things I have thought about are new projects and favorite television shows. And when presented with the question of what to post to my blog today, it was the television shows that shouted the loudest. Below, without much adornment, I present my 15 favorite television shows, as they occurred to me about an hour ago. I have left Japanese animated shows off this list, because for good or ill, they occupy a slightly different place in my mind.

1. The Sopranos. David Chase and his team of writers are cynical, cynical people with a cynical, cynical vision, and some of the greatest acting powerhouses in America. The American family, the media's mob, the meaning of life--it's all taken down with an impeccably entertaining touch.
2. The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show. This list is sadly lacking in television shows pre-1989, mostly because any shows I really liked from before then (Bewitched and I Love Lucy, for starters) were shows I pretty much haven't watched since I was a teenager, and thus don't really seem to count. But this show is practically nirvana. Its narrative tempo and proclivity for puns is, as far as I'm concerned, unrivaled.
3. Home Movies. The best American animated show since Rocky & Bullwinkle. Probably the best work anyone involved with it will ever do.
4. The Office (UK). Devastatingly funny. And just devastating.
5. The Wire. Season 4 may well be the height of series dramatic television. Season 5 isn't.
6. Curb Your Enthusiasm. Has anyone ever successfully pulled off a non-anthology horror television series? (Genuine question--I don't think I've seen it, though.) Because Larry David has, except he gives it to us dressed as a situation comedy.
7. NewsRadio. The middle three seasons of this show are probably the best, sharpest arguments for the medium of three-camera situation comedies that have ever been presented.
8. Freaks & Geeks. Show producer Judd Apatow has said that the good thing about so-called dramedies is that if the comedy falls flat, you can say it was supposed to be dramatic. Good thing this show excelled at both.
9. The Kids in the Hall. My favorite sketch comedy.
10. Seinfeld. Would probably be higher on the list, if I didn't think Curb Your Enthusiasm improved upon what Seinfeld started.
11. Mad About You. That seasons 4 through 7 of this show aren't on DVD is a sin. Few sitcoms could pull off capital-D Drama like this show could. That I've had a longstanding mancrush on Paul Reiser doesn't hurt. The show spun its wheels and got a tad too maudlin near the end of its run, but redeemed its worst moments with one of the best bow-outs that's ever graced television in its series finale. Really, my biggest beef with the show is that Anne Ramsay and Richard Kind both had their roles diminished as the show went on.
12. Arrested Development. The first season is pretty much perfect. Seasons 2 and 3 aren't, but they're still pretty great, for the most part.
13. The Simpsons. On the strength of its mid-nineties stuff, this might be higher. But then there's all the episodes I've seen from this decade.
14. Good Neighbors/The Good Life. Mid-seventies British sitcom goodness.
15. Darkwing Duck. I'll probably never be able to make a version of this list without Darkwing Duck.

September 12th EDIT: Slings & Arrows is conspicuously missing from this list. It belongs in the top 5-ish.

Labels: television, typical blog nonsense